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Biographical

The story thus far: YouTube, entitlement & a bit more bio.

Lately I’ve been busy setting up my YouTube channel and creating content, which has been a very rewarding experience. In this day and age, we have to hit all the angles to stand a chance of becoming visible. This includes Twitter as well, for which I freely admit to having a deep and unnatural loathing for. I’m sure I’ll get over myself eventually. Facebook is a bridge too far, for all sorts of reasons and I can at least point to it being darkly unethical. Jack Dorsey on the other hand has some aspirational qualities about him, bless his toes most highly.

Ultimately though and given my subject area, why should I care about social outreach? Won’t EJT grow organically if it’s any good? Perhaps yes, and absolutely not – and both at the same time.

Firstly, I do care about visibility, yet it’s neither about evangelical zeal nor egotistic yearning. It’s primarily about service. Consider having a product that some people need right now, in this very moment. Naturally you’d want to make it viable for them to discover and benefit from. That’s it in a nutshell. There’s also the money angle, let’s not forget that, but what‘s that about precisely? I’m allowing people to express their gratitude, and allowing myself a just reward. You know, fruits of labour stuff, we built a civilisation on it. Presently, the just-reward is paying for better equipment. That’s the ethic.

Secondly, if I sit back on the presumption that Earth Jakked will grow organically, then I’m wallowing in entitlement. I made my first talkie video about that subject. Sure, it’s rough and basic, but I’m just starting out and I’m not falling into the trap of waiting for perfection. I know from a marketing friend that many of her newbie clients suffer unresolved delusions of entitlement. You know, the ‘I believe in the product, so it has to succeed’ mindset. It doesn’t work that way, but at least belief is a good platform to start from.

An early attempt of mine conveying concentric spirals whilst approaching from the circular perspective… it doesn’t end well!

Having just said it’s not about organic growth, that’s still a factor. It happens all the time, but getting the initial traction is the tricky bit. Like nurturing a child before they become this great athlete. Very rarely do they pop out of the womb as a fully-toned up Olympian. I say ‘rarely’ because the Greeks tell interesting stories about such things, and hey.

Just knowing I have this great product that’s free to have and improves life quality isn’t enough. It’s a sweet trap though, isn’t it? Entitlement runs deep and can be so subtle we hardly recognise it for what it is. The world’s great religions have ostensibly killed people for this reason. It’s all quite hideous.

Entitlement has been a keyword for me these last months. It’s intrinsic to my journey and what I’m working through. I’ve been fortunate enough to get through a lot of shite in my life, but there’s always something more to deal with. Entitlement is my present lesson, because I’ve lived a thoroughly entitled life and yet never noticed. The next person is not me however and hopefully will do better than my shambles.

I am so grateful I‘ve been given this mirror, that I might see myself within

I don’t come from wealth, nor a lofty social class. I’m just very much in the middle, but have experienced both ends of the greater picture. Regardless, I’m not a regular person and I’ve always known this deep down. That, right there, is the entitlement root. Things have always happened around me. Despite all of the psycho-spiritual trauma, there’s always been a clear and present compensation applied for my benefit in other areas. One day, not that long ago really, all that compensating ended. I was on my own for the first time in my life. Things that used to be ‘automated’ now required me to get off my arse and do myself. I was the proverbial unclothed emperor and nearly spat my dummy (pacifier) out!

My domestic situation isn’t good. I co-created that of course, many years ago. For the longest while I was angry – raging – about my lot. I wasn’t a good person, like a cornered animal isn’t going to be your friend. Most of that period was when I was failing in my fight against possession. When life shoves you in the way of the hammer and the anvil, you’d better wake up fast. Yet I couldn’t escape it. Even today, with very different circumstances, that same framework seems immovable.

For a while I did manage to get away and in that space developed the seeds of Earth Jakked. Yet like a boomerang the situation came back for a second look. I’ve known for years that I had to do ‘something different’ to solve the problem and I’ve kept plugging away. I find it deeply amusing now, but I’d been looking in the wrong direction all along.

As human beings our first thoughts/actions in any situation are essentially external-facing. So ‘doing something different’ was an external concept for me. Get a better job. Arm-twist a higher salary. Move away, reduce connections. Logical, eh? Except that was just refining the same old same old. In the end, the difference was found within.

I thought it was Earth Jakked at first, and to be fair that’s partly it, but not quite. Doing the work and systematically reassembling my shattered chakra system has lifted me to the needed insight. And that is? Entitlement, of course. You see, my problematic situation revolves around the other person’s entitlement, and just how blinkered, ugly and harmful that can be. I am so grateful I‘ve been given this mirror, that I might see myself within. It’s 101 stuff. But you know, horses and water an’ all, such is our lot.

I might classify as angel, but I certainly ain’t no saint. Working on it though, one deadly sin at a time…